For those of you who find yourself binging Hallmark romcoms and muttering to yourself "I hate being single," rest assured that you're not alone. Western culture bombards people with the expectation of eventually 'finding the one' and settling down for a lifetime of love and happiness. However, there are far too many advantages to being single to fall prey to this derogatory narrative. So, when you're feeling particularly mournful about being single, use these helpful tips to help you celebrate your single status.
When You Feel, "I Hate Being Single"
One of the hardest, but most rewarding, parts of dealing with your sadness or frustration of being single is figuring out what about being single you dislike the most. Oftentimes, the root of your feelings can be absolved by other ways than just jumping into a foolhardy relationship. For example, if you start to investigate your negative feelings towards being single, you may realize that you really want a partner because you're feeling a little touch-starved for physical affection and intimacy. This is a problem you can work towards relieving by talking with those you're closest to and asking them for more physical closeness; there's nothing quite like a long hug from your best friend to recharge your emotional and mental batteries. Practicing this can help you understand that a lot of the time, people don't hate being single outright, they miss something they used to have in a relationship, and many of those things can be received through other, non-romantic, means.
Take Advantage of Your Opportunities
One of the most blessed things you have when you're single is the sheer freedom to do what you want, when you want it, without having to compromise with anyone else. If you want to take a job across the country, you don't have to factor anyone else's life into your plan. So, when you've come across the seventh obligatory 'happy couple' post on social media, turn towards relishing in one of these things that you can't (easily) do once you're in a relationship.
- Take a few weeks of vacation overseas.
- Decorate your house or apartment exactly how you want to.
- Take up a friend on a unplanned adventure.
- Seek out your own alone time whenever and wherever you want to.
- Stay up as late as you want to without worrying about waking up someone else when you go to bed.
Spend Your Free Time Learning a New Skill or Hobby
Some people would say that one of the downsides of being single is having a lot of alone time on your hands, but this doesn't have to be a bad thing! Finding substantive things to fill your extra time with can be physically, emotionally, and mentally rewarding. Jump into a cycling class or practice you're amateur embroidery skills; using your time to create and enjoy what your body and mind can do is one way to boost your confidence and security in your solitude, for however long it may last.
If You're Feeling Lonely, Get a Pet
Of course, pets are a real monetary and temporal investment, so you should only get a pet if you feel like you're up for the challenge. However, their unconditional love can not only boost a person's mood, but they can help you feel less alone. No matter what pet calls to you (fish, lizard, bird, cat, dog, and others), once it's you and your new best friend against the world, the ache of that loneliness will definitely fade away.
Use This Time to Get to Know Yourself Better
When you're not constantly concerned with another person's well-being, you have the wonderful chance to get to know yourself better. Learning who you are as a person, and the things you want to accomplish and see yourself needing in the future, can help you be better prepared for when you do enter into a partnership again. Once you're confident in yourself and your needs, you'll be able to find people who want and need the same things, hopefully leading to a lasting relationship.
Lean in to the Love Around You
Unfortunately, it can be all too easy to forget about the love that is around you when around every corner is a reminder that you should already be in a relationship. Yet, romantic love isn't the only kind of love that people need to enrich their lives, and it's important to remind yourself of the bounty of love surrounding you when you're feeling at your lowest. Text your friends for a movie night at your place or for a fun dinner out; give your parents, aunts and uncles, or whatever older adult means the most to you a long call. Cherish the platonic relationships around you and feed off of the love and support they're showing you. Let your loved ones remind you that you're cared for and that you're loved when it feels like that's not the case.
Celebrate Your Time Being Single
Most importantly, you should celebrate the life you've built for yourself and the person you've become at this point in your life; being single is the most time you'll ever have just to yourself, and you need to spend that time celebrating and relishing in all the great things that make you, you. So when the time comes that you're ready to commit to someone, you'll be fully ready navigate their quirks seeing as you've already become intimately familiar with your own.
